Sometimes I watch old dumb videos on YouTube because I have no life. Literally. My life consists of getting up, going to work, coming home, and going to bed. Be it old commercials from the eighties, or terrible training videos from fast food restaurants, it continuously fascinates me to no end. There’s something about watching these old videos that genuinely brings me back to a time that, obviously, isn’t coming back. It relaxes and soothes in a way that few things can. And while I’m aware that living life with rose-tinted glasses can be dangerous, it’s usually always fun to put them on occasionally to see just how modern-day life has evolved and changed over the years. Also I’m pretty sure I once heard my history teacher tell me that learning from the past is just as important as living in the present, so there’s that whole thing to pull out of my ass when someone wants to question why I’m obviously insane.
Below you’ll find just a few of the YouTube channels and videos that I use to escape into at times. Sometimes to just relax, other times to actually learn from the past, or at least laugh at just how dumb everyone was back in the day.
USA Cartoon Express
I watched this shit when I was a kid and still thought it was lame. All it ever was was endless reruns of Grape Ape, and a bunch of other old ass 70s cartoons that had no place at all on a modern network. At one point I threw my fucking milk across the room because they played four straight episodes of Jabberjaw. JABBERJAW.
Chuck E. Cheese Training Videos
I like to watch training videos. They always seem to bring a smile to my face with their over-the-top exuberance for a job that will pay a maximum of eight dollars per hour. The people forced to watch these are either fifteen-year-old kids, or adults that have long given up on having a real job, like myself. These videos for Chuck E. Cheese are amazing in that way. People actually had to watch these. They were forced to. Sadly thinking about their incredible misery brings me joy in a way that no normal person probably should. Also that hot dog looks damn good.
Old 90s Commercials
There’s something about the late 80s, early 90s that really sets it apart from the last few decades. Yes, the styles were terrible. Yes, the music was a cacophony of horror, and yes, even the hairstyles managed to beat out the 80s for absolute worst things you could ever do to embarrass your future self. But it didn’t matter. The early 90s did all of that, and people didn’t even need mind altering drugs to excuse it. That’s why I love watching these old ass commercials.
Old Video Game Playthroughs
You know things have gone bad when the only time you have to participate in your favorite hobby is by watching other people do it for you, and yet, here we are. So to catch up on my backlog of games I have promised myself I would someday play, I instead have resorted to watching other people play through them. The above is Bayou Billy, which is one of the most God-forsaken games I have ever played. So watch that I guess.
The Computer Chronicles
I love computers, and I love the history of computers as well. And there’s no better way to sit through the history of personal computers as watching episodes of The Computer Chronicles. Every single episode is full of incredibly archaic computer technology, along with some of the most awkward hosting and guests you could ever put into anything. From some guy who really thinks Real Player is a legitimate streaming platform, to a near constant worshiping of the Netscape browser, The Computer Chronicles chronicled close to two decades worth of computer and software releases, and it’s still just as amazing to watch today as it was then.
Mystery Science Theater 3000
If you’ve ever had an interest in awful old movies, then Mystery Science Theater 3000, or MST3K as the cool kids call it, is a master class in education. Many of the movies featured here are all time “classics,” and are just as important to view as the legit classics of the time. Unfortunately, too many people write these movies off as crappy memes these days, and are generally pushed to the side as nothing more than something to pull out at a retro party filled with unfortunate hipsters. Take a closer look though, and you’ll find a treasure trove of amazing movies that need just as much a critical mind to appreciate, as they do to laugh at. MST3K is an all time classic series, and if you’re not familiar with it, then there’s never been a better time to check out some of cinema’s more interesting creations.
Obviously, none of this stuff is interesting in the least to most anyone out there. I mean, there’s not too many social situations where you would ever admit to watching ancient TV episodes about the brand new DOS programs from 1985. But for me, they all have something that really puts me in a very specific time and place. Rose-tinted glasses may not be a healthy way of living each day of your life, but it’s never a bad thing to go back to for a bit to get a better grip on where you may be in the present.