It’s the goddamn future! We were expecting a lot of cool things, but all I ever hear is where are our jetpacks and where are the hoverboards? Well I want some other stuff, I have no intention of flying around. I want things that make life actually easier! I want my instant gratification to be more than instant! Struggling and hard work should be part of the tedious, awful past! We have things to do that we would rather have finished long ago. Chores are antiquated. Effort is so old-fashioned.

now!

Let’s get down to business. And by that I mean you should start a business and please make these for me.

 

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We are a-movin’ and a-groovin’ at the Sneer Campaign Official Headquarters. A-hustlin’ and a-bustlin’, too. As many of you know, Sneer HQ was obtained last year after an exhaustive search for the perfect place to establish ourselves, our empire, in order to create a better future — for us, for Covington, KY, and ultimately for the whole world. However, for various reasons, Dollissa had to stay in New Jersey for a while. Well, now she’s here! Sneer House is now a Sneer Home.

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Brought to us by the production company started by the father and son duo of Eugene Levy and Daniel Levy, this is the greatest show for us ever to wait three years to rave about. Schitt’s Creek is a sitcom with the absolute most perfect cast which has ever been cast, along with a premise that showcases their best comedic qualities.

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If you’ve been wondering where Chris Elliot has been lately, he’s currently the Mayor of Schitt’s Creek, a town named after his own family. Roland Schitt is a well-meaning but abrasive local fella who has roots in Schitt’s Creek, his beloved hometown.

The Rose family, an outrageously wealthy foursome, loses their riches due to the actions of their business manager and the only thing that they have left is… the entire town of Schitt’s Creek. Purchased as a joke gift for his son David, the patriarch Johnny Rose bought the town itself just for a silly quip. They move into some motel rooms and try their best to fit in.

 

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hiiiyaaa

Our love of so many wonderful and fantastical things often leads to some of our favorite mashups! For example, Mae West dancing with Davy Crockett or the Goldwarts Girls gathered round the kitchen table like always. On today, one of science’s most exciting birthdays, we’d like to tell you more about Carl Sagan Moon.

The Sagan Scouts represent his literal and imagined drives for Wisdom, Justice, Passion, Courage, Compassion, and all of the rest too. He was a multi-faceted talent, an abundantly well-rounded individual who could very easily be represented by nine pretty versions of himself who would go on to star in many series of mangas and animated shows. Any time we imagine how it could be presented, we wish oh we wish we had control of reality, because it would be our favorite show.

yasss

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We all have our different methods for getting some writing done here at Sneer Campaign. I use a few different methods, myself. They all work pretty well, but not always. Sometimes I need an extra push, or just to switch it up a bit. Sometimes I need a whole new method, so one day this list will be longer. And sometimes nothing works, and we put up an old omgj content, thank goodness.

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If you’re looking to write a whole bunch of posts for your own site, or anything even remotely similar, I have some very specific-to-me-and-to-Sneer-Campaign tips just for you! So please enjoy this meta post, written because I had no other ideas one day.

 

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We know you love to color, and you know we love to make delightful drawings of ourselves in our ideal lives, living together, as a group of actual friends. In the same place. Ideally, that place is sometime in the 1920s but only for purely aesthetic reasons. According to illustrations of that era, everyone was abnormally thin and lithe. They didn’t walk, they slithered. And that’s how we are too, on some level.

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A fondness or craving for sweets is the definition of “sweet tooth,” according to the internet, with help from Google.

Many times in my young life, I have heard people excuse their penchant for sugary treats by referring to the fact that they possess such a “tooth.” I have news for everyone. It’s not a good excuse. Pedophiles aren’t excused from child-touchery because they are fond of it, nor should people be excused of their sticky, disgusting habit out of fondness for sugar.

woah

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It’s that time of year again, of course, as you’ve seen in candy aisles, pop-up costume shops, and our double-week of Halloween content. Once again it’s time to think of new ideas for Halloween. New costume, new decorations, new scary movies, new parties, and new pumpkin carvings. Let us help you out with the last one so that you can focus on the rest.

Like your costume, your jack-o-lantern should be hip, modern, and a little bit sassy. And since you want it to be unique too, here are the ideas that we don’t want to use.

 

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