• no one has any smart phones
  • they don’t eat real meat anymore
  • there’s still white people
  • everyone isn’t addicted to the holodeck
  • there’s not one guy relentlessly quoting Seinfeld all the time
  • i guess i don’t really understand how a society could possibly exist without money
  • the government seems pretty efficient for the most part
  • they almost always do the right thing (as a group, anyway)
  • do they really only communicate with other ships when they are right near them?
  • everyone thinks the borg are evil but they’re just efficient. leave them alone.

Borglissa by Amanda Wood

Yo Gabba Gabba is a very good show for the very small child crowd, but it could be better. I am not at all suggesting that DJ Lance Rock is in any way deficient or lacking in wonderful personality. But imagine for a moment that a children’s show was designed to influence children to be haughty and urbane. What if instead of being taught to eat nutritious snacks and share with each other, they were taught to mix cocktails and silently arch their brows just so to convey snide judgment? Beatboxing and breakdancing are great, but are they as useful to know as how to seduce with a glance from across the room or how to melodramatically sigh before taking a deep drag from a ridiculously long cigarette holder that is perched in an impeccably manicured hand?

Decide for yourself. I know you’ll come to the correct conclusion. As always, click to make it larger. (You can see another example of Greta in an imaginary children’s television show on our Futility Street post.)

Yo Garbo Garbo! by Amanda Wood