As The Riverdale Turns

Friends have been talking about this show for a bit, but of course I waited for it to be on Netflix, my lord and savior. Now that the first season is up, I get what all the chatter was about. First of all, nice job Netflix with the spot featuring Cole Sprouse eating that burger. And fantastic job, The CW, for all of the rest of it. This show is already renewed for a second season, thank goodness. If you know me at all and we speak on a regular basis, I have already told you every line, plot, actor, setting, and other details of this show, whether you wanted me to or not.

jughot amirite

Anyway, as you can see by the way it says that Jughead is “finally” eating a burger that it’s not the Archie you know and love. It’s the Riverdale that you’ll get to know and then love. It’s a “subversive take” on the Archie comics characters. That pretty much means it’s Dark Archie but what it delivers is even better. What you get is some sort of fabulous and strange version of The O.C. combined with Scooby-Doo! Mystery Incorporated, but with Archie characters. As it turns out, that’s all I’ve ever wanted in such a show.


Played by Cole Sprouse, the alluring and delightful Jughead is the best character not just in Riverdale but also in the Archie comics. In the show, he is a hunter of justice, in the comics, one of burgers. The crown you wear atop your head clearly marks you the king, franchise drive-through or not. And I can be your Burger Queen, baby.

I digress. The actors playing Archie, Betty, and Veronica all do a great job, although they turned Archie into the lamest lame-o who ever lamed. I know that Archie Comics Archie is a nerd, but Riverdale Archie plays GUITAR and feels angsty and he oh no he has to choose between music and football! Whatever dude.

My surprise favorite, though, is Cheryl Blossom. She’s a dramatic bitch, rich beyond measure, and she may have loved her brother a little too much. But she’s relatable in her way, when you see how insane their parents are. Although, everyone’s parents on Riverdale seem a little insane, and they all have strange family feuds running generations back through their family trees.

The show just gets crazier and crazier, like Desperate Housewives or Nip/Tuck. It’s perfectly appropriate to the genre, once you figure out exactly what that genre is. It’s not quite teen drama, not quite murder mystery, definitely not quite comic book adaptation. But it works.

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