Xylo

How Not To Approach Dogwalkers

Noted sneer enthusiast and professional pet sitter, Xylo, joins us today with an informational image drawn by Amandoll. She explains with delicious exasperation how she tries to do her job but is frequently being stopped and interacted with. There are so many weird awful people and she wants them to go away. Perhaps they will see this list and correct themselves. We can dream! Consider this to be an international, universal plea from all dog walkers everywhere.

This is an image which lists 9 items with doodles around them. This is what the list says: If you see a dog walker (a "do not do" resource for the confused and the annoying, brought to you by xylo and the sneer campaign) 1. Please don’t try to take things out of the dog’s mouth, especially after I’ve told you not to three times 2. Please don’t try to lure the dog into your lanai, especially after I’ve said “oh please no” 3. You say your dog has never met another dog before and your dog is barking and growling so no I will not let your dog greet the dog I’m walking as a test for you and your dog 4. The dog was not “pissing on your plants” she was walking next to them because we’re walking on the street and your plants are next to the street 5. “Maybe I’ll get a hamster and you can come sit the hamster” wtf wtf wtf get away from me 6. “The only animal we had was moles and we killed those” is not appropriate conversation 7. There’s a pandemic please don’t walk up to me and show me pictures of your grandkids while I’m trying to pick up dog poop 8. Telling me I have the easiest job in the world is fucking annoying 9. Complaining about how much pet sitters charge to a pet sitter is gauche, especially since the amount you’re recalling is more than I get paid Under that list it says: "But you Can do: 1. say hello 2. mention the weather 3. smile at the dog and discuss how cute it is 4. just wave from a distance Thank you for complying"

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