On this site, we are a people of making lists and resolving to better ourselves, constantly, in as many ways as we can dream up. We set goals, and sometimes we even attain them! Those little glimmers of astounding success keep us on track to make more lists, and more vision boards, and desires that seem to be loftier and loftier.

“Dream big or go home,” we say. We also say “dream big and stay home because who would ever want to exit Paradise?” Not us, and not you either if you lived here.

Anyway we decided to start this year off with a list of things we would like to achieve around here, to hold ourselves accountable and not at all because we hadn’t made any lists like this in December and it’s already the afternoon and I only just now had a single cup of coffee. This is the last of the old ways fading out! Henceforth, only the new streamlined hyperproductive ways will shine. Mark my words.

Sneer Campaign

• Let’s write ahead of time again! We’ve been talking about it for like the last six months so let’s start doing that again! Let’s start THIS WEEK! Hup hup.
• A return of theme weeks! I’m sure you all loved them, and noticed at all! But they actually helped us maintain a focus and think ahead. I don’t think it was a coincidence that we stopped being as productive when we abandoned the theme weeks.
• Interactive fiction! It’s all the rage around here!
• Make some books! We have an issuu subscription now. Maybe we should make books and then you can buy them.
• Store products! Store culling! Sneer 1 Imports has been needing some care for a while. We will get to that this year!
• More recurring content! Much like theme weeks, monthly or semi-monthly content keeps us on track and helps to fill the week.
• Podcasts! We don’t like them but maybe someone does!
• Throw out Chat Comics, bring in Chat Cartoons after I learn to animate and pretend that it takes no time at all.
• Redesign! Listen, we like how things look right now but maybe there is something better? If there is, we will find it by Sneeriversary in March!
• Guest posts! You jerks, write for us.

Headquarters and Surrounding Area

• Gardening! We will add a new garden, Planuary in January, really stick to it this time.
• Chickens! No I’m not calling you out! But we are definitely going to add chickens to our lives at some point this year. Probably when we stop with having to travel all the time. Chickens by Summer?? Is that possible? YES.
• Finish the basement, complete with another bathroom and a small sauna, and a roller rink.
• More records! We have a record player and like four vinyl albums when we should have four hundred already.
• Leaving the house more often. Sometimes we go to cafes to work. Well. Once anyway. We should do that more. It seems “healthy.”
• Parties! We love to throw parties, for some reason! Themed parties. We want more!
• Importing friends! This will allow us to have more parties, too, but bringing friends in from around the world, either to visit, or preferably to buy a cheap house within walking distance. Yes. That is the realest dream of all.
• Saxon! We were going to bring Saxon in like, right now, but a hilarious and frustrating stream of home costs thwarted that plan. But we will have Saxon here for a month of good times, perhaps in July. I’m writing this down so that it is DECLARED.

Ourselves

• Don’t lose our productivity lists. A lot is depending on them this year!
• Schedule time for when we won’t want to work! We hurt, we become ill, we get sad — and we always forget to allow for time dedicated to nothing! So we should strike while the iron is hot and do days of things in one day, for all the days that we will eventually lose! Oh god.
• Self care! Meditay-toe, meditah-toe, intentional hypnosis, hobbies that will give us either insanity or content.
• Road trips and travelogues for you.
• Charities! Once monthly we will choose a charity, either a local one or anywhere, and donate to it in kind ways.
  
• Other sites, too, about us individually? Pay attention to usssss.
• Eat like people who want to be healthy. This might depend on Manny who will cook for us because there’s only so much energy in a day!

Cats

• Fat! The Captain and Zesta have an addiction to kibble, and it is up to me to figure out how to reduce their intake. It’s for their own good!
• Lazy! Zesta doesn’t play. She just doesn’t. And she should.
• Shiftless! There are bugs in here sometimes and do you think that the cats kill them? No they do not. All they do is eat and sleep and shed their gross fur everywhere.
• Uncouth! Some of the cats upstairs need to have some boundaries set. Need to have some civility taught to them, Custard. What a little wild animal in some ways.
• Shameful nudity! I wish to buy little clothing collars for all of the cats so that it looks more like an office around here. I already have one from Lumpy Buttons.